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Having a “Michael Jackson moment,” karate airline pilots, a caffeinless Jeremy, Alvin Chipmunk joins us, we discuss Lost theories, five uses for the Apple iPad, and the importance of shoelaces. Join the comedy!

Here are the crickets I wanted

Watch the Twilight: Modern Warfare 2 trailer:

Please suggest a joke with the punchline of “There were sixty cows!”

Weekly Noodlism

To make fun of those signs that redundantly say, “ATM machine” or “Adobe AIR,” I suggest “for your FYI,” “too much TMI,” “estimated ETA,” and “as ASAP as possible.” What else can we corrupt?

Lost season-six theories

• Walt will return to fall in love with Juliet’s baby
• Sawyer will pursue his calling in children’s ministry
• Juliet Burke’s name is close enough to the initials J.C., so she may reincarnate as the savior of the island
• Juliet is pregnant with Jack Bauer
• Since Juliet’s initials are J.B., she will reincarnate as the Jack Bauer with whom she is pregnant

Five uses for the new Apple iPad

1. The new Bachelor iPad for learning how to cook
2. Nose-blowing device for measuring your spray factor, which is how I theorize the event logo was created.
3. A color Etch-a-sketch with one button!
4. The heating iPad to keep you warm when you’re both in sleep mode
5. The iPad will replace the Wii Fit/Balance Board so that you can Wii on the iPad (and its multitouch capabilities will allow multiplayer, so it can bring families uncomfortably close together to Wii on the iPad together)

Sponsors

• D.Joseph Design—You have a message that deserves to look great! Get a new website design, web hosting, presentation design, or new media production and consultation
• You! If you shop through my Amazon.com affiliate link
• Jeremy’s “Photos 365″ project

Closing

Thanks for listening! I’d love to hear from you, especially your Ramen Noodle Experiences! Leave a comment on this episode, leave a rating and review in iTunes, leave a voicemail at (859) 353-4332, email me@theRamenNoodle.com, come to the Facebook Page, or leave sanity by following me on Twitter. You can also help support the show by shopping through my Amazon.com affiliate link.